The First Time You See Your Portrait.

My uncle Petia is probably my favorite painter, and not just because he is family. He is incredibly talented, and has been painting and drawing amazing art for decades. One of my favorite childhood memories is when my family lived in Sao Paulo and Petia lived with us. I remember coming home from school and running to his room, where I knew I would find him painting or drawing. To this day, the smell of oil paints and turpentine remind me of those wonderful afternoons, watching him paint and answering the questions he had about what I'd learned at school that day. It was this early, intimate exposure to art that made me fall in love with it.  

Last year, I commissioned my uncle to paint a portrait of me. We'd discussed several ideas, and I had sat for a set of pictures that he could then use as a guide. I said I wanted to have something with me writing, thinking it would be cool to capture me at the moment I launched my writing career.

He finished it late in 2017, a few weeks before I had another scheduled work trip to Brazil. When I got to his and my aunt Cecilia's house, I was nervous with anticipation to see it in person. He had it hanging on the wall in the dining room. I approached it, as if I were in an art gallery, and studied the piece. 

My first reactions were fast and immediate, and to be honest, pretty silly. As with most paintings I had seen in museums, I was surprised by the size. It is rather small, about 12x9 inches. I don't know why but for some reason I had expected a big, robust size, even though I knew he was going to use a smaller canvas. My second thought was that I don't own a shirt like that! 

Yet, after digesting it for a moment, I began to appreciate what an awesome work of art this was, let alone that it was in fact a portrait of me. Of Me!! Created by my incredibly talented uncle. 

My uncle and I have similar creative styles. We both kind of go with the flow and let our work take us where it may. Just as I don't sit and plot out every detail of what I want to write, he similarly doesn't really have an idea of the details of a painting until he gets to that point. I asked him about the idea behind the shirt he put on me in the portrait, and he said it just came to him in the moment. I thought of a scene in the Kingmaker that I had written that came to me in a similar vein. It is at times scary to create in this way, but the exhilaration of discovery in the moment is something I think we both thrive on.  

The afternoon was closing and it was time to get working on dinner. We sat for a few more moments on his couch, looking up at the painting, enjoying the view and, as always, each other's company.

"I love it," I said. 

"Yeah, me too," he replied.